16 Reasons I Really Like My Teenagers!

While on jury duty last week, I met a Mom of a teenager who made it clear she hates this stage of parenthood. Having struggled with infertility, she and her husband adopted a baby boy 16 years ago. Life right now wasn't what she imagined---the anxiety of having a teenaged driver, but being so glad he can drive himself anywhere, the abyss of school life, and the woes of his attachment to a young lady.

Her resignation to misery while parenting a teenager was heartbreaking. (No, there wasn't enough time while on break to convince her that parents can really like their teenagers--she refused to believe that my eight children could be homeschooled AND socialized. She surely wasn't going to take parenting advice from me.) And though my teenagers and I butt heads and logic skills often, I'm very thankful that I LIKE them!

1) They make me laugh. They're young adults, but they still don't take life too seriously. They remind me to be silly and lighten up.

2) They corner me while in the car and make me listen to their music. I mentioned in an earlier post that I know I'm old because I don't like all of the music my teenagers like. Yesterday, my oldest, the infamous Ink Slinger, played the particular music in question while I was driving and couldn't reach the iPod without causing an accident. I had to admit that I hadn't listened carefully enough to the music the first time, and it really wasn't as bad as I said it was. (They also thoughtfully play music I love when we're in the car.)


3) They forgive me. At an age when all too often so many hurts have built a wall between parents and teenagers, I'm grateful my teenagers see me for the sinner I am and graciously forgive me when I have wronged them.


4) They defend me. Maybe to a fault. 


5) They love my cooking and want instant meals at midnight. What joy there is in having teenagers who love my cooking. "You need to make more of that." "You need to keep lots of that in the fridge."  "This is very good, Mommy." It's also amusing to hear them ask for instant meals at midnight. If you find frozen mini tacos or pot pies in the freezer, they belong to the teenagers in the house because I can't keep up with their appetites as well as Stouffer's can.


6) They force me to know the difference between a conviction and a preference. 


7) They remind me to not slack up in being a diligent and consistent parent with the younger siblings. Sometimes this is painful, and often their perception is off, but it's good to be reminded to not get lazy or indifferent.

8) They like to talk to me. They share their thoughts on movies and books and interrupt me to read a great line from a great read. They want me to see funny videos and watch fight scenes, and they care what I think.

9) They think I'm the measure of a wife and Mama. At least for now. They'll grow out of that, but meanwhile, it's humbling to have conversations like this.

Me: You can't just give a baby candy every time you change a diaper!
Son: Why not?
Me: Because that's not how you do it. Besides, your future wife is going to think you had a very bad mother.
Son: Um, no, she'll be too busy trying to be just like you.

10) They love the LORD. And the Word. And the church. And their Pastor.

11) They're content. You won't hear them complaining about not having the latest computer game or name-brand jeans or cell-phone. They sure could use more space in their bedroom, but cheerfully make do. When guilt overwhelms me about what we can't or haven't provided, their contentment cheers and comforts me.

12) They're manly. Obviously when my daughter is a teenager, this one won't apply to her. :)  I like that I have manly teenaged sons. They open the car door for me. They load the groceries. They love on babies and wrestle with their brother and each other. They LOOK like men. They apologize and ask for forgiveness. They can handle edged weapons, and there's no doubt they'd give up their lives to protect me. 


13) I can cry in front of them. They jokingly roll their eyes or shake their heads, but they respect those tears that flow when my heart is overwhelmed by God's goodness, by His Word, by the wise writings of godly men, or by my own sin.


14) They always remember the chocolate. A trip to the store for milk means the guys will come back with at least three giant-sized Hershey chocolate bars. Even when I haven't asked for any. 


15) They graciously correct my pronunciation of words. Enough said.

16) They're walking pictures of the grace of God.
I cringe to think of what the tapes of my early parenting years would show. I know I'd hang my head in shame. I think these two were the guinea pigs in many ways, and so it's clear I can't take a bit of credit for their being so likable. They are testimonies of God's grace poured out in every area of my life.

There's more. There's so much more. But, I'll stop here.

Now if there was ever a bloggy-thingy in which everyone did their own post like another one (I know there's a proper name for it), I think this should be it! Come up with your own list, and let others know (and your teenagers) why life with a teenager, by God's grace, is a magnificent thing.

Much love,
Trisha

Painted As With a Needle

" 'I am wonderfully made'; that word ruchampti is very full. The vulgate renders it, 'painted as with a needle,' i.e. richly embroidered with nerves and veins."
~John Flavel


I know it's hard to see baby clearly at this stage of pregnancy, but surely you see the amazing arm and ear and head and nose in this profile. As Clairesy said, defaulting to the masculine pronoun, "him so cute!"

First, I have to clarify what I meant in my previous post about being lectured a bit about the risks of pregnancy at my age. It's not my doctor who lectures me. In fact, my OB is the greatest doctor in the world. One of 10 children, he has only been positive about our family size, and though he makes clear to me the risks of multiple c-sections, he has never told me he wouldn't deliver another one of our babies. This will be my 8th c-section, and he will have done 7 of them. He's an amazing gift from the LORD.

I also see a perinatologist, a high-risk pregnancy doctor, during my pregnancy because of my Crohn's disease. This doctor is great as well and has been most gracious and encouraging.

It's the geneticists who take my history, etc. and then present me with the risks for birth defects (just doing their job) that sometimes can't restrain themselves from sharing their perspective. Today I waded through the following:

"Aren't you tired?"
"Your body has been through so much."

And the one I'm going to post on my mirror to help me watch how much weight I gain......

"You're short for your weight."


Of course, this was news to me. HA!

Now that we're past that...if I could tell you face to face how my visit went today, I would grab you by the shoulders, look you square in the eyes, get teary, and tell you that everything looked beautiful.

The test they do for down's syndrome at this stage was normal (this is not a commentary on down's syndrome babies. If that was God's will for us, He would provide the grace to train up that precious gift for His glory and we would be so grateful for that privilege. With Claire, the geneticist was pretty sure she had down's syndrome and couldn't believe we weren't freaking out about that diagnosis), and the placement of the placenta (an issue with having had so many c-sections) was wonderful, too. The perinatologist admitted that that's her first concern when she looks at my ultrasound.

How gracious God has been to us through each pregnancy. It leaves me humbled and overwhelmed at His kindness. I don't take a minute of this for granted, nor am I unaware of how blessed we are. It's a thought that's never far from me.

So today I'm rejoicing in this good news. I'm praising God for that strong heartbeat, for this amazing glimpse at our precious baby being knit together, and for a healthy placenta. I'm soaking in every bit of His mercy, knowing that no matter what tomorrow brings, it will still be full of opportunities to praise Him over and over.

Thank you for rejoicing with me over this milestone. Thank you for continuing to hold me up in prayer. I thank God for you.

Love,
Trisha

Notes From Home

~Every time I sit down to write a post, I can't seem to put the words together. I know what I want to say, but I'm a bit at a loss for how to say it. And most of all, I'm not even sure I need to be saying any of it. Maybe every blogger has those times when you think you should pack up your stuff and go. You've said enough.

But this is my family blog, too. It's where I capture those memories that I love looking back on later. That seems to be the hardest thing to walk away from. I'm not sure I'd have the discipline to scrapbook my life like I do on my blog.

Time isn't an issue. My priorities are in order. My Beloved isn't telling me to quit. My Ink Slinger would tell me not to quit. So, I'll keep thinking on this one. If you have insight, I'd love to hear it. :)

~I can't wait to share with you about God's provision for me during my jury duty. It's not that I didn't want to serve, but being pregnant and having my Crohn's active presented quite a challenge. I'm so thankful for a merciful God who never forgets us even when we forget He hasn't forgotten us.

~Cap'n had his first haircut today. After battling a metal chair and losing (see bruise on forehead), he wasn't pleased to be told he was losing hair, too. He's such a serious little guy, and now he looks like a serious little man.

~I've made some yummy recipes lately and hope to post those, too: Homemade applesauce, a brown sugar chicken rub, five cheese toast, raspberry chipotle sauce cream cheese dip, cakey brownies, and and honey-garlic pork chops. Emma has been in the kitchen, too, and made some delicious homemade tomato soup yesterday. Mountain Man, who has been home sick all week, found it most comforting.

~Cap'n has his moments when he prefers Jake (Little Big Man) over me. Can you believe it? Ink, with great wisdom, tells me "it's time to start letting go." HA!

~I've used a baby doppler since I was pregnant with Miss Ella. They're worth every penny of the rental fee, and I'm in awe every time I hear that precious, precious heartbeat! Tomorrow I see my perinatologist for the first time during this pregnancy. I'll spend an hour hearing about the many risks of being pregnant at my age, and then I'll get to see this wee one on the big screen. :) Hopefully, I'll have an amazing picture to share with you.

~I've just finished George Grant's The Micah Mandate, and I loved it! I'm reading John Flavel's The Mystery of Providence with tissues in hand , and the margins are already full of "Amen" and "Yes!".

~I'm tackling Jonathan Edwards Charity and Its Fruits with the sad realization that I think I know almost nothing about Christian love.

~And it's official. I'm old. How do I know this? I don't like some of the music my oldest sons like. I never thought I'd see the day. :)

Much love,
Trisha

The Training of a Book Lover's Bodyguard

Weird things go on in our home, sometimes without my knowledge. I recently learned of attempts to turn Cap'n, who's still a baby, into a bodyguard. Not just any bodyguard. Perhaps the most important kind of all. A Book Lover's Bodyguard.

Meet Cap'n. (He looks a bit delighted to be in training, don't you think?) His assignment is to sit on the back of the couch while his older brother reads. If a Little decides to read in the same room, out loud, Cap'n gets the signal to "attack."

Here's the adorable Little who was Cap'n's first victim. Notice how cool, calm, and collected she remains through the training session, even though she now knows what to expect from behind her.

Here they are receiving instructions from the unnamed brother. Boy, he has them wrapped around his finger.

Cap'n starts to make his move when Clairesy reads aloud.

I'm comin' after you, sweet sister.

Am I supposed to take this seriously, little brother?

 Notice how Clairesy keeps hold of her book the entire time.

She even manages to smile, smile, smile. Such a good sport she is.

"You cannot read out loud in her when your big brother is reading a book. If you do, I will attack from behind and attempt a choke hold while falling all over you. I will laugh the entire time, but you will fear me. I am a Book Lover's Bodyguard."

"Hmm. I'm not afraid of you Mr. Book Lover's Bodyguard. Don't you know I'm bigger than you are, and you're supposed to protect your sisters? Anyway, all I need to do is show you the pictures in the book, and you'll forget you're supposed to attack and instead sit down and read with me."

Recognizing he has been the victim of his Big Brother's manipulative tactics, Cap'n shares a kiss of forgiveness with Clairesy, forcing Big Brother to craft more desperate methods to protect his reading time. Stay tuned for future tales of bibliomania.

One Little Did

All the Woulda-Coulda-Shouldas

Layin' in the sun,

Talkin' 'bout the things

They woulda coulda shoulda done...

But all those Woulda-Coulda-Shouldas

All ran away and hid 

From one little Did.

~ Shel Silverstein

The Taste It Leaves in My Heart

No book of evidence can be compared with that internal evidence which he obtains who daily uses the Word in the right way...The book satisfies and feeds his soul. A poor Christian woman once said to an infidel, "I am no scholar. I cannot argue like you. But I know that honey is honey, because it leaves a sweet taste in my mouth. And I know the Bible to be God's book, because of the taste it leaves in my heart."
~J.C. Ryle
Practical Religion

17 Things You're So Glad to Know About Me

My son did a fun post, "11 Things You Didn't Want to Know About Me." Here's my spin on that. Of course you want to know these things...because you can only feel better about yourself after reading them (or at least confirm your suspicions that I really am odd but you'd still love to have a cup of tea with me and sample chocolate together).

 ~I don't like talking on the phone, and I repeatedly fail to answer e-mails in a timely manner. I love writing letters, and I treasure one-on-one heartfelt, God-focused conversations with close friends.

~I'm the world's pickiest eater. Dinner invitations make me very nervous. I don't want to be rude and not eat what you've set before me. I know that's selfish. But I also don't want to vomit at the dinner table, and I truly might do that if you ask me to eat broccoli casserole. My close friends graciously accept my pickiness and stick with foods they know I'll eat or suggest we share in making the meal or that we eat out. They don't watch my plate or take my refusal to eat what they've made as commentary on their cooking. Oh, how I love those friends!

~When I was little, my Dad used to make me sit at the dinner table until I finished my food. It would be 9:00, and I'd still be sitting there. His tacos, though, and fried flounder were the best, and he never had to make me finish those.

~I was born with club feet and had to wear corrective bars on my legs when I was little. I would lie in my crib and just bang my feet against the wood over and over, screaming. My siblings couldn't stand to hear it and wanted my Mom to take the bars off. I'm glad she didn't, though! (There's a great parenting lesson here.)

~I love to cook. I know. I love making my family new foods, even though I won't eat those foods much of the time. And I do make my children try new things because I don't want them to be like I am.

~I'm an introvert. Social gatherings are not my thing. I don't enjoy church potlucks or large parties. I'm often perceived as standoffish or rude when really I'm just uncomfortable and awkward. That said, I fight constantly against this tendency (and fail over and over), recognizing how self-centered instead of others-centered it can be.

~If you correct my grammar while I'm speaking to you or use an incredulous tone in response to a question I've asked you, we probably won't have many deep conversations in the future. (unless you're my child. :))

~I talk to people when I'm driving. I know they can't hear me, but I still say things like, "Why would you pull out in front of me when I'm driving 60 mph, and you're only going 30? Are you crazy!?" I'm working on this. I really am.

~I struggle with laziness, and I'm the queen of good intentions. I wish I had more to show for the years I've been alive (as Sara Groves puts it). I often make great plans but have very poor follow-through.

~If I could change some things about me, I'd have pretty feet, a willingness to try new foods, brains and wisdom like Cindy at Dominion Family or Persis at Tried With Fire, and a heart that loves as unselfishly as my Pastor's. (Thankfully, by God's grace, there's still hope for the last one.)

~I am terrified of mice. Terrified.

~I hated school and dreaded going almost every day. I suffered with severe test anxiety, was beat up, and endured endless mocking. When I was graduated, I felt like a bird released from its cage. There's no doubt in my mind I would be a very different person today if I had been homeschooled.

~I take a nap almost every day. That's because I stay up late with my older boys and get up early with my Beloved.

~I'm not on Facebook, and I'm annoyed by the assumption that everyone is..."Did you see so and so's post on FB?" "Oh, that's right. You're not on FB." I'm thinking I'll be on FB the day I become an extrovert.

~I love salty french fries dipped in a Wendy's Frosty.

~I have some book sense but not a lot of common sense.

~I'm the last person I would have picked to be a Mom, and I LOVE being a Mom. Every day I'm in awe of God's mercy in giving us children because there are so many things I don't get right. I am proof that God's grace is what you need most as a parent.

All of that said, I love the truth that nothing is impossible with God, and that what's true about me today might not be tomorrow.

And I'm not counting this one because I hope it's something you already know about me. I'm continuously amazed at your gracious words. I'm deeply thankful for every one of you! You show me God's grace every time I post. Thank you for sharpening me, praying for me, laughing and crying with me, and encouraging me.

With love,
Trisha

Froot Loop Cupcakes

***Warning: This is a potentially hazardous post containing reference to sugary cereal loops and the encouragement to consume them. Proceed with caution, understanding that admitting you have allowed your children to eat these might win you the Bad Mother of the Year Award and cause you to be the focus of much gossip among mothers who have, as one said, "never let a froot loop cross my children's lips." You've been duly warned.

Now on to the fun. We made these for Claire's birthday yesterday, and they were a hit. Even my Beloved, who is missing a sweet tooth, liked them. The lemon and orange zest add such a nice touch to the ordinary vanilla cupcake. I doubled the recipe and used whole milk.

Froot Loop Cupcakes
from Crepes of Wrath
who adapted them from Gastronomy Blog

1/2 cup (8 tablespoons) unsalted butter, room temperature
1 cup granulated sugar
1/2 teaspoon vanilla
2 eggs
1 1/2 cups all-purpose flour
1 1/2 teaspoons baking powder
1/4 teaspoon salt
1/2 cup milk 
Zest from 1 orange and 1 lemon
1 1/2 cups Froot Loops
Powdered sugar, for dusting (optional)

1. Preheat the oven to 350 degrees. Grease and/or line 12 muffin cups.
2. Using a mixer, cream the butter until light and fluffy. Add the sugar and continue to cream for 5 minutes. Beat in the eggs one at a time, followed by the vanilla. mixing in well.
3. In a medium bowl, sift together the flour, baking powder and salt. Mix into the butter mixture alternating with the milk in 3 batches (flour, milk, flour, milk, flour). Add orange and lemon zest to batter.
4. Scoop 1/4 cup of the batter into each muffin cup of the prepared pan, and sprinkle the tops with a generous amount of cereal.
5. Bake for 20 to 25 minutes, until the cupcakes are puffed and firm in the center and light golden brown on the edges. When ready, remove from the oven and allow to cool in the muffin tins for about 10 minutes. Remove from the tins and allow them to cool completely before sprinkling with powdered sugar. Makes 12 cupcakes.

Of course, if someone tries to take your cupcake, you might have to give them THIS look, like Cap'n did, to let them know not to mess with you and your froot loops.

Happy Baking!

With love,
Trisha

Three

 Today marks three years with Claire Jubilee. She's our miracle baby. Her name means "rejoicing in the light of Christ's salvation."

Claire is Latin for "bright" or "illustrious." "The Lord is my light and my salvation; whom shall I fear? the LORD is the strength of my life; of whom shall I be afraid?" (Psalm 27:1)

Jubilee is Hebrew for "one who rejoices." "But I have trusted in Thy mercy; my heart shall rejoice in thy salvation. I will sing unto the LORD because He hath dealt bountifully with me."
(Psalm 13:5,6)

You can read her story here (short posts):The Story and the Name~Part 1
The Story and the Name~Part 2

Too often as time passes, the magnitude of God's mercies dims in our memories. Even now as I read back over her story I'm surprised by the details I've forgotten, a reminder of the importance of recording our Ebenezers as they happen.

When she stumbles out of her bedroom, I'll see those blue eyes and that blonde bed-head. She'll ask for tea and want me to hold her. She'll be so excited that today is her birthday, and she'll want her presents NOW.

She'll say, "I luh you so much, Mommy."

And I'll watch those fingerprints on the wall get a bit higher as I praise God for the joy and privilege of being her Mama.

Happy Birthday, Claire! May you always shine brightly for the LORD and rejoice in the light of His salvation!